The Fred Show

The Fred Show

Laugh with us every weekday morning.Full Bio

 

Best Of Waiting By The Phone: SEE THE WINNERS!

Here is the full list of winners!

12/16:

HE TEXTED HER FROM THE BATHROOM

HOUSE FULL OF HOLES

12/17:

HE SUCKED ON HER TOE

HE DOES REVOLUTIONARY WAR RE-ENACTMENTS

12/18:

50 Shades of Grey Role

She Breeds Ferrets

12/19:

She cleaned his place naked

Batman role-play

12/20:

The Heir to the windex fortune

He Pretended To Be Mark Walberg

12/23:

He Said He Was On The Real World

He Drew On Her Back

12/24:

She Looks Like His Ex and Smells Like Pickles

He Eats Oreos On The Toilet

12/26:

Lil Dookie

He Took Her To The Strip Club

12/27:

He's 98 Degree Biggest Fan

He Broke Her Couch

12/30:

He Wanted A Swift Kick In The Balls

Gay Fireman Porn

12/31:

"Panties Droppin"

His Mom Made Her Breakfast

1/2:

He Wouldn't Leave Her House

Fantar The Fantastic

1/3:

Suck My D And Tell Me I'm Beautiful

He Pooped The Bed

1/6:

Blow Job In The Alley

He Works In "Beverage Distribution"

1/7:

Slim Fast My Nuts

Target Drug Deal

It's 30 DAYS OF Waiting By The Phone, and we want to hear from you!

VOTE ABOVE for your favorites! YOU CAN VOTE AS MANY TIMES AS YOU'D LIE

1.HE DREW ON HER BACK

Sam and Jamie met online, exchanged numbers and went on two dates. He said he felt like he was falling for her but hasn't heard from her since she slept over after the second date. Why? We call her and she says he drew on her back while she was sleeping and it completely freaked her out. He said he's an artist and it's beautiful.

2.HE SAID HE WAS ON "THE REAL WORLD"

Adam and Sammy met at a networking event, exchanged numbers, went out and even hooked up. He thought they had a great time so why isn't she calling him back? We call her and she says she isn't calling because during their date he told her he was on "The Real World" and "The Challenge" which she later found out was a lie. He says he never said those things.

3."PANTIES DROPPIN'"

Lisa and Chris got set up and went out. She had a great time on the date but now Chris is ghosting. Why? We call him and he says Lisa is a "frigid bitch." He says he took her to a nice restaurant and she ordered a ton and didn't put out. Every time she ordered something he thought "Oh shrimp cocktail... PANTIES DROPPIN'!"

4."SUCK MY D*CK AND TELL ME I'M BEAUTIFUL"

Matt and Kelsey met on "The League", exchanged numbers, went out and even had a sleepover. He had a great time, why is she ghosting? We call her and she says in the morning she noticed he was wearing a shirt that said "Suck my dick and tell me I'm beautiful" as a pajama shirt.

5.HOUSE FULL OF HOLES

Ashley and David work at the same company and met at a training seminar. They exchanged numbers, went out and even hooked-up. He had a great time but now she's not calling him back. Why? We call her and find out he had a great time but now she's not calling him back. We call her and she says she saw a book next to his nightstand called "House Full of Holes."

6.THE HEIR TO THE "WINDEX FORTUNE"

Greg and Carrie met at a bar, hit it off and exchanged numbers. They even hooked-up and Greg thought everything went well but now Carrie isn't calling him back. We call her and she says Greg told her he doesn't need to work because he's the heir of the "Windex Fortune" and she realized he was lying.

7.SHE LOOKS LIKE HIS EX AND SMELLS LIKE PICKLES

Elizabeth and Danny met at a club, exchanged numbers and went out. She hasn't heard from him since the date though, and is wondering why. We call him and it gets WEIRD. Not only does she look like his ex, she smells like pickles and made him wear a hat during sex.

8.HE WOULDN'T LEAVE HER HOUSE

Greg and Macy met on Instagram, exchanged numbers, went out and hooked up. Greg loved it all but Macy isn't calling him back. We call her and find out that after they hooked-up he slept over and stayed at her place the entire day. He was even there when she got home from work!

9.HE TOOK HER TO THE STRIP CLUB

Michael and Dana met on a dating app, exchanged numbers and went out. He had a blast but now she's ghosting. We call her and find out that he took her to a STRIP CLUB for dinner. He doesn't see the problem and says they have great good.

10.HE EATS OREOS ON THE TOILET

Grant and Kim met on a dating app, exchanged numbers and went out. He says they really clicked and even went back place to hook-up so why isn't she calling him back? We call her and she says after their hook-up, she went to the bathroom and saw he had FOOD in there. Oreos on the toilet, apple on the sink and other food in the trash. He admits to eating in the bathroom and she's disgusted.

11.HE SUCKED ON HER TOE

Kenny and Madeline met on Bumble and went out dancing. She wanted to go back to his place after, which he took as a good sign, so why is she ghosting? We call her and find out that while she was at his place she complained that her feet were hurting from dancing and he offered to give her a foot massage. Everything was great until he started sucking on her toe!

12.50 SHADES OF ROLE GREY

Josh and Sarah met at a friend's party and connected. They went out and even hooked-up. He had a great time so he's very confused as to why she's not calling him back. We call her and she starts cracking up when we mention the date. She said that during their hook-up, he started role playing and pretending he was Christian Grey from "50 Shades of Grey." He was dropping lines from the books and she thought it was hilarious. He said he found out she was a fan and was trying to impress her so he read them. She thought it was ridiculous.

13.HE POOPED THE BED

Joe and Stephanie met and went out for drinks. He had a blast but now she's not calling him back. Why? We call her and she says they hooked-up, he slept over and in the morning he was gone but she realized he sh*t in her bed. He won't fully admit it but says it's "possible."

14.HE'S 98 DEGREES' BIGGEST FAN

Dan and Sarah were set up through a mutual friend, talked on the phone of an hour and arranged to go out. After that... nothing. He wants to know what happened. We call her and find out he's SUPER into 98 Degrees and that freaked her out.

15.SHE BREEDS FERRETS

Stacy and Matt met out at a bar, exchanged numbers and went out. She had a great time and wanted to see him again but he never reached out. Why? We call him and he said she breeds ferrets and he's grossed out.

16.GAY FIREMAN PORN

Gavin and Cecilia met on a dating app and bonded over being "nerds." They went out and he invited her back to his place to play video games. He was impressed with her gaming abilities and wanted to see her again but after she left she never answered his calls or texts. We call her and find out that during the date he had to take a call and she was left browsing his gaming system. She found "gay porn of firemen with boners." He nervously says that's "probably a virus" but we don't think so.

17.SHE CLEANED HIS PLACE NAKED

Natalie and Marcus met on a dating app, went out and back to his place. She slept over and everything but now she's ghosting. Why? We call her and find out that he woke up and she was cleaning his entire place. The call gets really weird. He's wondering if his place was dirty? Why would she do that if they're not dating.

18.HE WORKS IN "BEVERAGE DISTRIBUTION"

Amber and Mark met at a bar, exchanged numbers and made plans to meet up BUT she stood him up. Why did she not even give him a chance? We call her and she says that when she met him he told her he works in beverage distribution but two days later she saw him working at Starbucks... he's a barista. So he lied. But he disagrees.

19.HE DOES REVOLUTIONARY WAR RE-ENACTMENTS

Shawn and Becca met online and decided to go out. He had a great time but now she's ghosting. Why? We call her and find out he's into "re-enactments" of The Revolutionary War. She's not down with that.

20.LIL DOOKIE

David and Sophia met at a happy hour, exchanged numbers and went out. He had a blast but she never responded again after the date and he wants to know why. We call Sophia and she says he handed her a "mixtape" when they got back to his place. He says he's an aspiring rapper named "Lil Dookie" and he completely changed his persona.

21.BLOW JOB IN THE ALLEY

Jamie and Jason met at a bar, exchanged numbers and hung out the next night. She had a great time and they had plans to see each other again and she was excited but then he ghosted. Why? We call him and find out that after the date he saw her giving a blow job in an alley on the way home. She says it was in a car and it was her "baby daddy"... she needed him to watch their kid so she did him a "favor."

22.BATMAN ROLE PLAY

Bryce and Amanda met at a bar after work, exchanged numbers and went out. He had a great time but she never called him again and he wants to know why. We call her and she's familiar with the segment so she knows he's on the phone but says he is too freaky for her. During the date, they both discussed they're into role play but after that he went to the bathroom and came back as BATMAN... voice included. It was too much. He defends himself saying that she admitted she was into role play but it totally scared her.

23.HE WANTED A SWIFT KICK IN THE BALLS

Aaron and Chelsea met, went on a date, and even went back to his place to hook-up but she stopped herself in the middle. He assumed she just didn't want to go all the way but didn't think there was a real problem so he assumed they would hang again but now she's ghosting. We call her and she says mid hook-up he asked her to "kick him in the balls." WTF. He tries to defend himself but he's not denying it happened...

24.SLIM FAST MY NUTS

Sean and Mia met and went out twice. He had a great time with her and really liked her but after the date she stopped communication and he wants to know why. We call her and she says he got really "fat" between the first and second date. They bicker and he starts to go after her. She says he should do Slim Fast. He says "Slim fast my nuts!"

25.FANTAR THE FANTASTIC

Rich and Kenya met and hung out twice. He had a great time but she stopped answering after he cooked her dinner at his place. We call her and she says that during dinner he disappeared and came back in a magician costume and started doing magic for her. He defends himself and says his magician name is "Fantar the Fantastic." She's disturbed.

26.HE TEXTED HER FROM THE BATHROOM

Mike and Mary met, exchanged numbers and went out. He had a blast but she's ghosting. Why? We call her and she says during the date he went to the bathroom and texted asking for a "h*nd job."

27.TARGET DRUG DEAL

Allison and Matthew met and went out. She had a great time but now he's not calling her back. Why? We call him and find out she did a cocaine drug deal on the date in a Target parking lot and he's not down to go to jail.

28.HE BROKE HER COUCH

Mark and Andi met on Plenty of Fish, went out and even hooked-up. He loved everything about her and the date but now she isn't calling him back. Why? We call her and find out that he broke her couch during the first two minutes of their hook-up. It was too rough! She's pissed.

29.HIS MOM MADE HER BREAKFAST

Rob and Heather met the bar where she works, exchanged numbers and went out. He asked her out and he thought they had a great time. They even went back to his place... well his parents place but that didn't seem to be a problem because they made out all night. It's now been weeks and she hasn't answered his calls or texts. We call her and she said everything was fine until the morning when his mom insisted she stay for breakfast. She said Rob is a "nice Italian boy" and his mom doesn't want him to move out until he marries a woman who can take care of him like she does. He also took her out in his dad's nice car instead of his own. It was too much.

30.HE PRETENDED HE WAS MARK WAHLBERG

Jacob and Andrea met on Tinder, exchanged numbers and went out. He said the date was great and they had so much chemistry that they hooked-up but now she's ghosting. Why? We call her and find out that during their hook-up, he started pretending he was Mark Wahlberg and wouldn't break character... even when they said goodbye. He claims girls LOVE Marky Mark but she's freaked out.


Sponsored Content

Sponsored Content